Intimacy Skills: Teaching Clients How To Communicate, Manage Conflict, & Keep Agreements (4 CE Hours)

Course Description:

Most individuals and couples enter therapy with a specific vision of their problems. For example, they may describe themselves as having “anger problems,” “sexual incompatibility” or “trust issues. ” a skillful therapist will explore how the clients’ framing of their situation is keeping them stuck—and how they might change that. You’ll learn how to identify the powerful client narratives that keep people stuck in their dysfunctional patterns. This class will describe and demonstrate various skills that improve communication. Using insights from linguistics, social psychology, existential psychology, and cultural studies, we will examine what makes communication smooth, and what creates obstacles to it. We’ll also consider the common client concern: “why do we always have to talk about our feelings?” to understand what enhances or diminishes intimacy. We will look at psychological issues like fear of rejection, fear of abandonment, and fear of being known. We’ll also look at the human yearning to be seen, understood, and accepted. We will discuss conflict as a collaborative rather than adversarial activity. We’ll examine guidelines for making conflict more productive, and therefore shorter and less painful. That includes the role of self-discipline, techniques of “fair fighting,” and the goals of healthy conflict.

Learning Objectives:

• To describe the architecture of intimacy 
• To list reasons people find intimate communication difficult 
• To describe the structure of helpful couples’ agreements 
• To describe the difference between adversarial and cooperative conflict 
• To name tools we can use to help patients use various concepts regarding intimacy

Schedule 

30 min: The architecture of intimacy
30 min: Communication: What makes it difficult?
30 min: Communication: What can make it easier?
30 min: Agreements: A discomforting key to intimacy
30 min: Agreements: Making, negotiating, keeping
30 min: Conflict: Adversarial or cooperative?
30 min: Conflict and “people pleasers”
30 min: Summary and questions

Speaker Bio:

Dr. Marty Klein, has been a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and a Certified Sex Therapist in Palo Alto, California for 42 years—over 40,000 sessions with individuals and couples. Marty is the award-winning author of seven books on sexuality and relationships, including the ground-breaking Sexual Intelligence. Psychology Today simply says “To improve your sex life, buy this book.” Marty frequently appears in the popular media, such as The New York Times, National Public Radio, and The Daily Show. His blog (www.SexEd.org) and monthly newsletter are frequently cited as sources of innovative thinking about sexuality, culture, politics, and the media. Marty is a Qualified Forensic Expert testifying in state and federal courts. He recently gave two Congressional briefings on evidence-based sex education. Each year, Marty trains thousands of psychologists, physicians, and policymakers in sexuality—across the U.S. and in 35 countries to date. Audiences invariably describe his talks as thought-provoking, practical, and entertaining.